Punchlines

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"I'm a man!
- Well, nobody's perfect!"

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"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room."

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"Ernest Hemingway once wrote, "The world is a fine place and worth fighting for." I agree with the second part."

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"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist. And like that... he is gone."

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"The unknown future rolls toward us. I face it, for the first time, with a sense of hope. Because if a machine, a Terminator, can learn the value of human life, maybe we can too."

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"There have been tyrants and murderers and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall. Think of it. Always."

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"Right after I got here, I ordered some spaghetti with marinara sauce and I got egg noodles and ketchup. I'm an average nobody. I get to live the rest of my life like a schnook."

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"Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take away our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!"

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"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer"

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"This is the West, sir. When the legend becomes fact, print the legend."

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"Why so serious?"

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it. You know, I just… do things The mob has plans, the cops have plans, Gordon’s got plans. You know, they’re schemers. Schemers trying to control their little worlds. I’m not a schemer. I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control things really are. So, when I say… Ah, come here.
When I say that you and your girlfriend was nothing personal, you know that I’m telling the truth. It’s the schemers that put you where you are. You were a schemer, you had plans, and look where that got you. I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and I turned it on itself. Look what I did to this city with a few drums of gas and a couple of bullets. Hmmm? You know… You know what I’ve noticed? Nobody panics when things go “according to plan.” Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, a gang banger will get shot, or a truckload of soldiers will be blown up, nobody panics, because it’s all “part of the plan.” But when I say that one little old mayor will die, well then everyone loses their minds!
Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It’s fair!"

"...some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn."

"I believe whatever doesn't kill you, simply makes you... stranger."

"You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain."

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"Il ne lui manque que la parole !"

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"Il faut que tout change... pour que rien ne change."

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"Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off. "

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"Is that what love is? Using people? And maybe that's what hate is : not being able to use people."

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"Happiness only real when shared."

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"I'm sorry, but I don't want to be an emperor. That's not my business. I don't want to rule or conquer anyone. I should like to help everyone if possible; Jew, Gentile, black man, white. We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other's happiness, not by each other's misery. We don't want to hate and despise one another. In this world there is room for everyone, and the good earth is rich and can provide for everyone. The way of life can be free and beautiful, but we have lost the way. Greed has poisoned men's souls, has barricaded the world with hate, has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed. We have developed speed, but we have shut ourselves in. Machinery that gives abundance has left us in want. Our knowledge has made us cynical; our cleverness, hard and unkind. We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity. More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost. The airplane and the radio have brought us closer together. The very nature of these inventions cries out for the goodness in men; cries out for universal brotherhood; for the unity of us all. Even now my voice is reaching millions throughout the world, millions of despairing men, women, and little children, victims of a system that makes men torture and imprison innocent people. To those who can hear me, I say, do not despair. The misery that is now upon us is but the passing of greed, the bitterness of men who fear the way of human progress. The hate of men will pass, and dictators die, and the power they took from the people will return to the people. And so long as men die, liberty will never perish. Soldiers! Don't give yourselves to brutes, men who despise you, enslave you; who regiment your lives, tell you what to do, what to think and what to feel! Who drill you, diet you, treat you like cattle, use you as cannon fodder. Don't give yourselves to these unnatural men - machine men with machine minds and machine hearts! You are not machines, you are not cattle, you are men! You have the love of humanity in your hearts! You don't hate! Only the unloved hate; the unloved and the unnatural. Soldiers! Don't fight for slavery! Fight for liberty! In the seventeenth chapter of St. Luke, it is written that the kingdom of God is within man, not one man nor a group of men, but in all men! In you! You, the people, have the power (...)"

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"Just because she likes the same bizzaro crap you do doesn't mean she's your soul mate."

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"They dance like they've danced before.
- It's a familiar dance, monkey nipples, they both know it."

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"Many that live deserve death. Some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo?"

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"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh. Beneath this mask there is an idea, Mr. Creedy, and ideas are bulletproof."

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"All creatures feel fear.
- Even the scary ones?
- Especially the scary ones."


"Why do we fall, sir? So that we might learn to pick ourselves up."

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"You claim you can trust them. But you know what the people are. You know the inner compass that should direct the soul toward justice has ossified in white men and women, north and south, unto utter uselessness though tolerating the evil of slavery. White people cannot bear the thought of sharing this country's infinite abundance with Negroes.
- A compass, I learnt when I was surveying, it'll... it'll point you True North from where you're standing, but it's got no advice about the swamps and dessert and chasm that you'll encounter along the way. If in pursuit of your destination, you plunge ahead, heedless of obstacles, and achieve nothing more than to sink in a swamp... What's the use of knowing True North?"

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"Careful you must be when sensing the future Anakin. The fear of loss is a path to the dark side.
- I won't let these visions come true, Master Yoda.
- Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed that is.
- What must I do, Master Yoda?
- Train yourself to let go... of everything you fear to lose."

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"Listen, if you really wanna do this with your life you have to believe you're necessary and you are. People wanna live like this in their cars and big fuckin' houses they can't even pay for, then you're necessary. The only reason that they all get to continue living like kings is cause we got our fingers on the scales in their favor. I take my hand off and then the whole world gets really fuckin' fair really fuckin' quickly and nobody actually wants that. They say they do but they don't. They want what we have to give them but they also wanna, you know, play innocent and pretend they have no idea where it came from. Well, thats more hypocrisy than I'm willing to swallow, so fuck em. Fuck normal people."

"You know, the feeling that people experience when they stand on the edge like this isn't the fear of falling - it's the fear that they might jump."

"Did you know I built a bridge once?
I was an engineer by trade.
It goes from Dilles Bottom, Ohio to Moundsville West Virginia. It spans 912 feet over the Ohio river. Steel through arch design. 12,100 people a day use the thing.
It cut out 35 miles each way of extra driving to get from Wheeling to New Martinsville. That’s a combined 847,000 miles of driving a day… and 25,410,000 miles a month and 304,920,000 miles a year saved.
I completed that project in 1986… 22 years ago. Over the life of that one bridge that’s 6 billion… 708 million… 240 thousand miles that haven’t had to be driven! At let’s say… 50 miles an hour that’s 134,164,800 hours… or 5,590,200 days… so that one little bridge has saved the people of those two communities a combined 15310 years of their lives not wasted in the car… give or take."

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"Was I bored? No, I wasn't fuckin' bored. I'm never bored. That's the trouble with everybody - you're all so bored. You've had nature explained to you and you're bored with it, you've had the living body explained to you and you're bored with it, you've had the universe explained to you and you're bored with it, so now you want cheap thrills and, like, plenty of them, and it doesn't matter how tawdry or vacuous they are as long as it's new as long as it's new as long as it flashes and fuckin' bleeps in forty fuckin' different colors. So whatever else you can say about me, I'm not fuckin' bored."

"Waste not, want not.
- And other clichés.
- But a cliché is full of truth, otherwise it wouldn't be a cliché.
- Which is in itself a cliché."

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"Quand on y pense, le plafond, c’est sûrement le dernier truc que voient plein de gens. Au moins 90% des gens qui meurent, tu crois pas ? C’est sûr. En plus, quand tu meurs, la dernière chose que tu vois elle reste imprimée dans ton œil, un peu comme une photo. T’imagines le nombre de personnes qui ont des plafonds dans les yeux ?"

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"Et vous, qu'est-ce que vous faîtes?
- Moi ? Rien.
- Rien du tout ?
- Non.
- ...
- Enfin... J'essaye, c'est pas facile."

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"Ce n'est pas une image juste ; c'est juste une image."

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"You take it away... to show them what they had."